Archive for toxic places

What’s the big deal?

August 3, 2010 · Filed under toxic places · Tagged , , , ,

A great way to get out of any situation and make another person seem a little nuts is to ask, “What’s the big deal?” when they get annoyed about something. Suddenly, you’ve effectively taken the heat off of the thing you’ve done wrong, and redirected the conversation to the supposed overreaction of the other person. A brilliant tactic. So when I stand my ground and decline offerings of toxic snacks that are directed at my kids, I get irritated when the response is, “What’s the big deal?”

It may not be a big deal to the person who is adamant about giving junk to kids, (even though this type of person is often doing it to win affection or attention, or to reward, praise, or comfort the child), but it’s a big deal to those of us who are trying to keep unneccessary crap out of our kids.

Is anything in life a big deal? Often the attitude is, if it won’t kill them it can’t be that big a deal. We’ve all dealt with the quandary of explaining to someone that even though immediate death will not result, it’s still kind of a big deal.

You come home and are less than pleased to find out that your husband put the kids to bed with no dinner and no bath. He tells you to calm down and asks, “What’s the big deal?”

Your wife changes the channel for just one second at the exact moment that there’s a winning touchdown. She reminds you that you can watch the game highlights later and asks, “What’s the big deal?”

Your spouse declares that your in-laws will be moving in for a month while their house is being renovated. You say you’ll be moving to  the backyard. You’re told to stop being so dramatic and are asked, “What’s the big deal?”

Will anybody drop dead from the above situations (I guess that depends on your in-laws)? Probably not, but it doesn’t mean that they’re not big deals, and it doesn’t mean that you don’t have the right to care about them. There’s a whole shade of gray in between the black and white of life and death.

The extended version of this commonly asked question is, “What’s the big deal? It’s just this once,”  which is a big  bunch of baloney. Every person who encounters your kids says that, not realizing that while it’s once from them, it’s also once from everyone else. By the end of the day, your kids have consumed just one piece of crap from twenty different people.

So what’s the big deal? I’ll tell you. Our kids have the right to enjoy food that’s not laden with fake, lab-concocted chemicals. They should have the benefit of knowing that they can live freely because we’re looking out for them. Is anyone going to drop dead immediately after eating a partially hydrogenated cookie? Probably not. But we have no idea what the overload of chemicals in the food we feed our kids will ultimately end up doing to their health.

Sounds like a pretty big deal to me.

Leave a comment »

Do you believe in junk?

June 15, 2010 · Filed under toxic places · Tagged , , ,

Religion. No matter which one you might be a part of, it’s supposed to be about spirituality. A group of people believe in something, and maybe feel so strongly that they live a certain lifestyle, surround themselves with like-minded people, and possibly even join together and pray. Most of all,  they work very hard to pass these beliefs onto their children. So far I get it. Enter food.

How do you get kids interested in religion? How do you motivate them to join you in your beliefs? I guess you’ve got to make it appealing to them. There are lots of ways to do this. Kids like games, music, singing, dancing, and exciting activities. But a cheap and easy motivator is food. Let’s say you are part of a religious institution or place of worship. You might attend this place once a week. When your children walk in, they hang out with other kids in a fun setting run by great counselors. When the group time is over, they get treats. Then they walk into a big room where all of the adults congregate. There they get more treats. Then they follow you home and maybe have a fun afternoon with some guests that you’ve invited, where they have, yes, more treats. Later in the day, there are afternoon activities at this religious institution where the kids once again have more treats. It’s been a holy day, spirituality is everywhere, but it’s hard to find underneath all the junk.

What’s the big deal? Is it terrible for our kids to have treats once in a while? Of course not. But the message that we’re subliminally sending them is that sugary junk snacks are a necessary part of this religious experience that we claim is so important to us. We’re not stupid, and neither were our parents. Food is the greatest motivator, a primary reinforcer, and when we receive tons of treats in conjunction with another activity, such as attending a religious institution, we begin to have sweet associations. It works, but it’s a cheap trick. We shouldn’t be selling religion to our kids with food.

Leave a comment »

Where are you Jamie Oliver?

May 10, 2010 · Filed under toxic food, toxic places · Tagged , , ,

You may have watched Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution over the past few weeks. If not, all you need to know is that he helped change the mentality of an unhealthy town, particularly by making changes in their school lunch program. Why? Because the kids in that small town in West Virginia were eating crap for breakfast and lunch every day. I loved the show and hope it influenced people. Sadly, those people are clearly not preparing the lunches at my daughter’s school. How do I know? Because I received an email earlier, informing me of a change in the menu for the week. The change? “Tuesday we’ll be serving deli; Thursday we’ll be serving hot dogs.” ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME? Why why why serve that to children?  Or prisoners for that matter?  These are non-food items that have been masquerading around as food. And why do we call them deli and hot dogs? They should be called “cured leftover cow parts” (often the less favorable parts). They’ve got nitrites too; do some research on nitrites so you can become aware without my having to be the alarmist.

What would I rather see on a school menu? Practically anything. I’d rather see leaves, dirt and lint balls.

Luckily, we don’t participate in the optional school lunch program; however, I still care about the other children in the school. Feels like it’s time to push for a change….

Comments (1) »

Every day is a holiday

May 5, 2010 · Filed under toxic places · Tagged ,

Do you remember those special days once in a while days in elementary school where there was a birthday or a holiday to celebrate? If you were lucky, they happened once a month, so there were 10, maybe 20 days in a school year where you’d get special treats, like a piece of cake or some cookies. Not any more. Nowadays, every day is a holiday.

There are some real holidays, like Thanksgiving, some invented nevertheless worthy celebrations like graduation, and then a million ridiculous holidays and celebrations that have been conjured up for seemingly one purpose; to stuff children with food. On numerous occasions my kindergarten aged daughter has come home from school with any of  the following reports:

She: “We had twizzlers today!”       Me: WHY?       She: “Because it was the 100th day of school!”  (Wow, that’s really exciting. Isn’t this “holiday” supposed to be about counting by fives and tens up to 100? At the very least, it’s a math related holiday, not a food related holiday)

Two days later….She: “We had cupcakes today.” Me: “Oh, was it someone’s birthday?”  She: “No, it was cuz the third grade put on a play.” (????)

One week later….She: “We had ices today…red ones…I think they had bad chemicals…”   Me, lying: “Oh, don’t worry about that….but WHY?    She: “We finished reading a  book.” (That’s great; isn’t that what you’re supposed to be doing in school? Apparently the prize of literacy isn’t validating enough)

It goes on….

“We had taffy today!”    REALLY? TAFFY? ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME? “Yeah, it was leftover from Josie’s birthday party last week.” Fantastic! So the party isn’t over until every last drop of crap has been consumed by the children.

“We had marshmallows today!”  SUPER! Why? “Because we learned about Lucy’s dad’s job; he came in and told us all about being a banker. Then he gave us marshmallows”   Uh huh, and banking is connected to marshmallows HOW?

The best was when my THREE YEAR OLD reported that they had lollies in school. Again, I pretended that I was so pleased, because she seemed so pleased. “Wow, honey, that’s so great. Why’d you get lollies?”  “Because we did ballet!” (Again, ?????)

It’s not just birthdays anymore; the list of ridiculous occasions goes on and on. Maybe next year the schools can put these holidays on the schedule, and mark them as “Days you won’t want to bother attempting to feed your kids dinner because they will undoubtedly get off the bus with diarrhea; furthermore they will be in the middle of a sugar crash when you see them so be prepared for them to act like psychos.”

I can totally appreciate the once in a while made up celebration, but do our kids need junk food because their teacher became a grandmother? Or because someone lost a tooth? Or because it was lice check day? Or because it was raining? Or because 2 plus 2 equals 4?

I’m all for teaching kids to celebrate life. I’m all against teaching them that if there’s no food, it’s not a celebration.

Comments (1) »

The toxic mall

April 8, 2010 · Filed under toxic people, toxic places, toxic products

I live near 3 malls which I have categorized as the toxic mall, the non-toxic mall, and the partially toxic mall. Perhaps I should be honest and admit that in this context, toxic really just means “overly, ridiculously expensive.”  It could also mean, “full of  obnoxious salespeople who act like they’re better than everyone else and are too important to crack a smile.” Maybe I’m just bitter that I literally cannot afford anything in the toxic mall. Nevertheless, this is where I found myself today (I needed something from the kitchen store so I can cook non-toxic recipes for my family. As an extra bonus, I found material for my blog).

So there I was, at the toxic mall, when I passed through a department store makeup counter. I went to check if one of my formerly favorite brands had yet cleaned up their skin care line and gotten rid of some of the stuff that practically everyone knows is bad, like parabens. Sadly they had not. A saleswoman approached; she was unexpectedly friendly. After she spoke for a minute I decided to attribute her non-toxic, non snobby demeanor to two facts; she was from another country and she had just started this job. Both points had thus far shielded her from the toxic ways of the toxic mall. She excitedly started recommending toxic products to me from my formerly favorite skin care line when I cut her off and explained why I would not be purchasing anything. “Bad ingredients?” she said with a heavy accent. “Please, to show me this ingredients.” So I did. She seemed genuinely interested as well as confused. She started pointing to all the different counters, asking, “How about that one? Or that one? Maybe that one?”

“Bad, bad, bad,” I said.

“But I don’t understand, “she exclaimed, pointing back to the original skin care line in question,. “They said this stuff was all natural!” I didn’t know which word to focus on first. They (the evil vendor)? Said (lied)? All (very few things in life are all or nothing)? Natural (what does that word even mean)?

At this point I noticed a couple of typical, snobby saleswomen standing nearby, pretending not to be listening, yet their disgust was quite apparent on their grouchy, plastic faces. I imagined their internal dialogue…..”How dare a crazy heretic come in to our store and question the holiness of our beauty products! How dare this same heretic try to corrupt one of our newest saleswomen???”

“Listen,” I said to my new saleslady friend/project, the woman I thought I might actually be able to influence, “I don’t want to cause a whole uproar here at______ (insert snobby department store of choice), but please, I beg you, don’t believe everything you’re told. If you have questions, if you want to actually know what you’re putting on your body, start looking into these things. You can find  out lots of stuff online. Make your own decisions.”

I ask the same of you, my friends…..

P.S. I later went into a well known cosmetic store to see what non-toxic products they had. I asked the saleslady if they’ve been getting more and more requests for these types of products, and she said yes! CHANGE IS COMING!!!!

Leave a comment »

Free poison!

March 23, 2010 · Filed under toxic food, toxic places

I’m sorry, Dunkin’ Donuts guy. You’re a really nice person. Although I’ve never met you, I feel like I’ve known you forever. Every Sunday morning when my husband comes in for his (somewhat toxic, heavily sugared ) iced coffee (and brings the kids so I can get a break), you give my children free munchkins. At first it was just one or two each. Now we’re at the point where you’re filling up huge plastic cups with powdered, chocolate, sprinkle and glazed holes of poison. Let me clarify; I know you are just being friendly and kind. This is not your fault.  You’re just trying to make a living and brighten the day of a couple of little kids. You do not know what you’re selling. Until recently, neither did I. You see, I made a conscious effort not to look up the ingredients in the munchkins in effort to not sabotage what has become a Sunday morning routine. Then, one day, I just had to know. Boy was that a mistake, because once you know there’s no turning back.   We’re not talking about sugar and the stuff we typically think of as “bad”; we’re talking about chemicals such as bleached wheat flour (humans are not supposed to eat bleach), propylene glycol (something also found in skin care products; something you should not even put on your skin let alone into your body), partially hydrogenated oils (by now everyone knows these are bad) and a whole long list of other garbage.

My husband took the news about the poison ingredients pretty well, and we’ve been doing homemade  Sunday mornings;  (non-toxic) chocolate chip pancakes with (non-toxic) whipped cream and (non-toxic) syrup. The kids are happy and that’s what matters.  But Dunkin’ Donuts guy, here’s where I became suspicious of you. Last Sunday my husband visited you alone while we waited in the car on our way out. He returned to the car with two cups; one full of coffee and the other full of donuts. I will give you the benefit of the doubt and say you were still just trying to be nice. Here’s the other scenario I considered: On your first day as a drug dealer doughnut seller, the manager showed you how to select the food with the wax paper without getting your germs all over, then he showed you how to make coffee, and then you had an intensive three hour workshop on how to get kids hooked on your products. It’s the most ingenious form of marketing; get into little kids’ minds while they’re still young. Usually this happens through commercials, but you’ve come up with a whole new level of evil; give them tons of doughnuts every Sunday and they’ll keep coming back for more. As soon as they are independent enough to go out alone, they’ll pay you regular visits. Do you get commission for this?  Does the Dunkin’ Donuts training manual say, “Get ten kids hooked every week and you’ll achieve ‘employee of the month’ status. Get twenty hooked and get a promotion.” After all, you know my kids by face. Maybe you’re just waiting until they walk in on their own and  ask you for a tall order of crap, then you’ll flash the secret signal to your boss and you’ll get a big raise. No, you’re too nice. I’ll assume you are a victim of the same thing the rest of us are; assuming that “if it was that bad for us they wouldn’t sell it.” HA!

So anyway, Dunkin’ Donuts guy, I’m not mad at you, but you should know the secret plan that we’ve come up with. When I asked my husband why he accepted the donuts if the kids weren’t even with him, he said,”I just felt so bad. The guy seemed so disappointed that the kids weren’t there.”  So we don’t want to hurt your feelings. We decided the best option is to go to Whole Foods where they have packaged (somewhat non-toxic) donut holes, sneak them into our pockets at Dunkin’ Donuts, accept  the huge cup of munchkins that you will undoubtedly continue to give us, and then make a swap when the kids aren’t looking. Everybody wins! It’s a bit ridiculous to pay money for doughnuts when we can get them from you for free, but that’s the price we have to pay for trying to live this non-toxic lifestyle.

One more thing, Dunkin’ Donuts:  learn how to spell doughnuts. It’s not cute the other way and the children in this country have enough spelling problems as  it is.

Leave a comment »

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.